


see u.

by amazonphil (rei_oh_three)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Blind Character, Blindness, Coffee Shops, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Phil Lester/Original Character, Sad Phil Lester, Short Chapters, Slow Burn, Sporadic Updates, currently experimenting with first person narration again, due to time constraints this will be s h o r t, i'm sorry guys, only when i feel like it, this was last edited dec 2018, very short
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2019-08-16 21:14:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16502816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rei_oh_three/pseuds/amazonphil
Summary: phil lester suffers from stress-induced blindness at the age of twenty-eight. his world is dark for a while, and then he meets daniel howell.-plot very loosely based on and heavily inspired by filipino film "kita kita" (i see you) and a song also inspired by it, "kita na kita" (i can see you now) by moira dela torre and jason hernandez. was titled "can you see me now?" much earlier.[[on hiatus/undergoing editing. in need of inspiration. i'm on tumblr !!! @reinbowberry]]





	1. phil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> meet phil.

**one:** phil

 

“hello, mar— yeah, it’s phil. mhm, doing great, thanks. the fridge magnets are really helpful! and i did receive what you guys sent me in the mail. it’s wonderful! yeah, yeah... tell corn i said hi. bye!”

the phone call was brief. it ended way too soon for my liking.

i muttered verbal commands to my phone, and soon i could hear soft piano music playing from the speakers. i left it on its charging station and got up, using the walls to support me.

you see, i live in a fairly small neighbourhood in brighton. i suffer from stress-induced blindness. it's wonderful how the brain works, don’t you think?

i felt my way downstairs, clutching on the railings as i counted the steps. a visual memory resurfaced in my mind, showing me the variety of houseplants that used to sit on my windowsill.  _ all of those plants must be dead by now… _

i felt something ugly twist in my guts. i felt horrible. i miss the colors. everything was just lights and shadows now.

_ i think i'm going outside today. _


	2. dan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> meet dan.

**two:** dan

i woke up way too early - 23:46. fuck my sleep schedule. i decided to stay up, scanning tumblr for anything interesting, before going to twitter, then checking instagram, then repeat. i barely noticed time pass.

my annoying alarm ringtone made me jump from my relaxed position.  _ it’s already monday? well then. _ i hit “snooze” and flopped back to my soft pillows. I let out a long yawn and closed my eyes. sleep overcame me in no time at all.

my anxiety-inducing alarm clock rang again, making me jolt awake.

i let out a long groan. i grumbled as i prepared my outfit for the day, attempting to rub the sleep from my eyes. i brushed my teeth until my mouth’s minty, then prepared my breakfast. It’s just a simple cereal, nothing too fancy.

i used to work as an assistant in a music company recently until i was fired. i moved to this small neighbourhood in brighton in hopes to start anew.

i approach the balcony, bowl of cereal in hand. i gaze down at the streets idly.

my phone is charging at the moment, allowing me some space to think. i recall my mum telling me that thinking is such a dangerous thing. i never knew what that meant until my first existential crisis, which preceded a panic attack. that was fun.

my gaze falls back to the quaint neighbourhood catching the last bits of early sunshine.

_ should i try to go outside today? _


	3. un

**un**

 

my hands easily found the front door.

i step outside. a rather remarkable day, it seems… 

my eyes were met by soft white light, but beyond that, i perceived nothing else, other than the occasional dark moving pattern which i couldn’t make out, even if i squint. i can only assume that those are humans, animals, or aliens that somehow coexist with humans.

if that’s the case, it’s really unfortunate that i didn’t get to see aliens take over the already-overpopulated earth.

“good morning, phil!”

“hello mr. phil!”

i turn to the voices aimlessly. “hello to you too, peter and gertrude!”

“to your right!” said a voice. must be peter. bubbly laughter followed. i couldn’t help but chuckle.

“oh, sor—” “don’t apologize, mr. phil! don’t be sorry for your blindness!” cried gertrude, cutting me off.

a smile made its way to my face. “thanks, gertrude. so what’re you two up to today?”

giggles. their positivity was infectious, making me feel bubbly and light. “we’re going to be welcoming the new neighbour!”

“who’s this new neighbour of ours, if i may ask?”

“mummy says he’s her old classmate’s kid! he moved two days ago.” said peter.

“oh, that’s nice.”

“mr. phil! i have an idea!” said gertrude.

there was a pause. i heard indecipherable chatter between the two kids. then silence. i can almost feel their excitement buzzing through the air around me.

“are you guys going to tell me that or…?”

“phil, can you please, please, please come with us? pretty please? it’ll be super fun!”

“oh, um…” i hesitated.

“please, mr. phil!”

“...sure-”

barely finished with my reply, the kids started dragging me to somewhere.

“wait, wait, wait, guys! slow down!”

“are you kids bothering phil again?” i heard a familiar voice call.

“it’s no problem, susan! they’re taking me to the new neighbour’s house, i think,” i said, hopefully loud enough to be heard.

“oh dear, i told them to do it at a reasonable hour! the poor man seems to be asleep right now. people these days can't be bothered to take care of themselves,” i heard susan say. “peter, gertrude, you two help phil get back home, then come back here, alright? you two have school today, come on.”

i let the two small hands guide me back to my front porch. we said our goodbyes, and i went back inside.

i made my way to the kitchen, fingers gliding over plastic sticker labels on mason jars until i found one that said “coffee.”

i made instant coffee with little difficulty, accidentally getting a bit of hot water on my hands, enough to hurt a bit but not enough to actually burn. i sighed. i disliked being blind. i dislike how i took so many things for granted before.

most of all, i extremely dislike kyle.

if it weren’t for them, i wouldn’t have experienced enough stress to experience blindness, of all things.

i’m still coming to terms with my blindness...

...even though it’s almost been a year.

the sad piano that played in the background annoyed me. _there's no need to make me feel worse than i already do._ i decide to turn the music off.

i felt my way outside, mug of coffee in hand.

the light was comforting, at least.

i sat there, pondering what-ifs and could-have-beens, occasionally looking around. somewhere- anywhere.

_i really wish i could see._


End file.
